Inside Outside
by MissNitaGirl
Summary: My first attempt at a Jello-Forever prompt March: 'standing on the out outside' full of Jisbon/Jello "I though I could live without you but I can't, Teresa"


A/N: havent written in a bit so i hope you all like this is for the Jello-Forever march prompt "standing on the outside"  
not betaed but have read and re-read ALOT  
Disclamer: yeah right... as if i own it but iff your offering i will pay a reasnoable price ENJOY :)

Inside Outside

_outside looking in_

Patrick Jane stood on the outside most of his life never quite _'normal' _always different. But for once he wished he was on the inside. Why he hurt her he would never know he would wonder for a long time if it could have been different for them. What if they hadn't  
waited all that time?

Patrick would never know how much he really needed to be on the inside until it came to her and that night. But right now it seemed like the right thing to do it didn't feel like he was running away, but he was. She needed time, time that he didn't want to give her because he couldn't stand the thought if anything without her, so when she didn't  
get what she wanted it all fell further apart, if only he had listened. He use to be good at figuring out what people needed and wanted, but when she had told him plain and simple he couldn't understand, he couldn't listen to her. He _should_ have listened to her.

Then he had stood outside her house looking in the window seeing her all emotional as she sat watching princess diaries eating ice cream, tissue in hand dabbing at her eye (even though it wasn't a sad movie) he knew the real reason for her tears as he watched her.

He really hadn't planned to stay away so long it was only meant to be a week or two at the most a month. But he got busy doing nothing and next thing you know half the year had gone by, and then a whole year past, and another and two more after that and he was still gone.

He had tried to write to her but never sent the letter. He had been ready to go back but hadn't even got the keys in the car. So he had to figure out what was stopping him and get rid of it and he finally had, that was how he got to where he was now exactly five years later same window same apartment and same Teresa Lisbon. Except that there was  
one difference, she could see him.

_Inside looking out_

She couldn't believe her eyes, she had no clue how to feel. Five years, he had been gone for five years without a word, she felt a lump forming in her throat, why was he back? What was he doing? She stood for a while just thinking about the past, their past and then she started thinking about there feature more specifically the next few minutes that could very well change the whole course of her life. He was still standing outside her house, outside her life and she really had no idea if she wanted him back on the inside.

Lisbon was pulled from her thoughts of her wounded childhood, stressful work life and her confusing privet life by his sharp knocking on her door. She moved to stand by the door and stood on the inside thinking over if she should let him in. On the outside of  
the door Jane was hoping desperately that she let him in, just let him say what he needed. Finally she opened that door and let him in, not only to her home but to her life once again.

"Patrick," she started but he interrupted.  
"Teresa I need to explain, I'm sure your wondering what I'm doing here after five years of no contact I have to confess I really don't no but I had to see you"  
She cut him off this time and lead him into her livening room.  
"how can you do this, I thought you were gone, for good and just when I think I'm ready to move on with my life you show up again. Didn't you know what you meant to me? What you _mean_ to me?"  
"I though I could live without you but I can't, Teresa I've tried but I can't. I want you, I need you!"  
"I know but we can't, it's just not the same anymore"  
"you _'can't'_ or you _won't_?" he questioned.  
Teresa Lisbon took a deep breath what was she talking about this is what she had wanted the moment she realized he wasn't coming back, but now..., now she was too afraid to let him back in so long without. With him on the outside she didn't know anymore.

He watched her as she spoke the first most obvious thing was that she spoke with passion. She believed every word that came out of her mouth to be the truth but as he watched her longer he saw the uncertainty inside. The way she questioned herself and him too and that gave him the little bit of hope he needed to push that bit harder to convince her that they could go back to what they had.  
"Sit" he saw fear flash in her eyes at his sudden words.  
"I know me showing up now like this has confused you and it has done the same to  
me. Why now? I don't no but Teresa I'm surprised your still here you could have moved house or anything but no, your still here and I think that counts for something. I haven't had a life since I left and I can tell just by looking at you that you haven't either. So why not give this a second try? If you can give me three good reasons why we shouldn't try again I'll levee and never come back"  
"how can you say that?!" She asked as she stood up. "How can you say that you would levee again when you know what it did to you the first time?" She paused for effect but he didn't answer "But your right I can't think of three reasons, well I could if I tried, but I don't want to because my life was empty without you. So I will not let you go again. I want you back!"  
"I want you back too" he exclaimed.  
"Would you kiss me already?" she asked her breath mingling with his. Jane pulled her down to him and devoured her lips in a passionate spark filled kiss, she lent back for just a moment now straddling his lap.  
"god, iv missed you" she said kissing him again. This time he pulled back  
"My names Patrick not god" he commented laughing and kissing her at the same time, Teresa just rolled her eyes.

Early that night the last thing she expected to happen was to see Patrick Jane standing on the outside, and she defiantly didn't expect to let him back in.

The last thing he had expected earlier that night five years ago was to no longer be on the Inside of her life and he defiantly didn't expect to be standing on the outside for so long.

Hope you liked and dont be affrait to let me know what you think xoxo  
Until next time


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